Kaitlin Pignataro

‍ Sing along to Kangaroo by This Mortal Coil and pretend my voice is the violin.

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Are there many studies on the connection between nerve damage and apathy? I have a pinched nerve in my neck.

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Stare at the wall, get high, listen to Throbbing Gristle 20 Jazz Funk Greats and get a little scared.

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Cosey Fanni Tutti comes from Mozart's Così fan tutte I think? I have been very into opera of late and have been listening to Maria Callas and Montserrat Caballé. I have been trying to make myself cry while listening to O mio babbino caro but I just can’t.

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My lips are so pale in comparison to my face. I think after my potential new employers interview me they google my name and realise how unemployable I am. I have turned my instagram private. Cannot have them seeing a quarter of my nipple poking out of my bikini in a drop top lol, or my semi inappropriate writing.

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Too bad for this website, however.

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I watched an excellent video on different Fach types, and you can be a mezzo soprano or a spinto soprano or coloratura mezzo-soprano. I wish I stayed learning harp but I wanted to be ‘cool’. The opera has so many beautiful names like Klytaemnestra and Agamemnon.

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My phones totally fucked now like not working at all so I just navigate silently in my mind.

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Getting a beer now, Polish booking made for dinner but I have no appetite. I'm just a balloon and soon I’ll be released and float away. I am slowly detaching my brain.

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Grand final tomorrow, and will go drink and watch it and be patriotic. My skin looks great, makeup wise.

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We saw the green fields turn into homes…

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Fought with Robbie because he vomited on the stairs. Watched the footy but got more joy out of assembling the food and basically putting my germs on what everyone was about to eat.

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April came and saved me from the like 15:1 gender ratio. I told her I wrote about our trip to the city the other month but reversed everyone's names which has been of huge novelty recently.

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When Lirpa and I went to the city last month, it was like a five-for-$75 deal on underwear at Victoria’s Secret. I got a neon yellow lace pair, and Lirpa got a hot pink matching one, and Adnama the same design in bright lime green. Then Yzzaj got teal, and Eilam got pink and white stripes. Adnama was the first to receive hers, and Eilam will be the last because her birthday's not till late November, but we're very good at planning, and we like to shop.

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I had a heap of appointments in the city, more or less doctor shopping, or should I say dermal shopping, to see where I could get half a mL in my tear troughs and then a mL in my masseter and in my temples. I went to, like, a Korean one, and then I went to M1 Med Beauty in the Paton Building, which apparently is quite reputable. The girls at the front desk were so incomprehensibly overfilled; it looked like malpractice, but maybe that’s what they wanted?

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Both quotes were eye-wateringly expensive, but they did give me a good evaluation and basically told me that I don't need anything in my tear troughs because it will puff me out, but because I had such a large masseter muscle from TMJ, I should really just get some Botox in it, and, you know, a couple units wouldn't be that much money. It was actually quite validating to hear someone confirm to me that I have a very wide jaw, as I've always thought such but like your friends or mum would never agree if you asked.

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I did really push for the whole eyebrow lift situation, which they said can actually be achieved without having to get threads done. It's just a little more expensive.

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Anyway, I had them write it all down on a piece of paper for me because they can't email it over due to, like, consumer laws and, like, body image issues with teenagers or some shit. And I snatched up those brochures and went on my merry way.

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Lirpa and I got our bras fitted at Victoria's Secret, but when they measured me, the sales assistant said they didn't usually carry a 30 band for A cups, which was great for my self esteem. I still have my complimentary measurement card, but when I told her my name is Kaitlin with a K, she wrote Kathleen on it instead.

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I still have not made any appointments because I found a really good clinic in Bundoora that does, like, a layby option, so they'll give you your injections, and you don't even have to pay up front. You can get a payment plan with, like, no interest at all.

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I just feel like the idea of having my dermal fillers and Botox on layby, I don't know. Is that irresponsible? I did this, like, test online to see my credit score, and it says it's really good, but also, like, how do they know what my credit score is? I don't even have a credit card, and I've never taken out a loan, and I've never had debt.

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Felt mildly irritated that everyone was less sober than me, idk what is wrong with my body. Felt great anyway. Was told I look like Kiera Knightly?

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